Dad schools Jeff

Using some good old fashioned home cooking, Dad pulled several moves out of his bag of tricks to dominate me playing h-o-r-s-e 3 games to 0. I was powerless to match his vast array of half court shots, corner threes, mid range jumpers, and hook shots. He was on fire and couldn't miss! I'll never live this down. He just kept yelling out, "YESS!!" And then the ball would swish. Over and over, he made probably 80% of his shots. I was speechless. I did, however, challenge him to a game of one on one which sort of evened the score as I earned back a small amount of respect. I still could not believe how he managed to hit a couple of fade away threes just over my finger tips. Dad truly was the man this night, and as we left I said, "You might as well quit now while you're ahead, because you'll never be this good again."

Dad's Christmas Break Schedule

7:00 Wake up, proceed to the tub to study scriptures or pictures of the kids at his school. (Dad has been trying to memorize all their names)

9:30 Breakfast--while he watches Law and Order

10:00 Studies pictures of kids

12:00-2:00 afternoon nap

2:00 Wakes up when mom comes out and starts yelling at him for not doing anything.

2:30 Gets up, walks around, then goes back to sleep while a football game is on in the background.

3:30 Goes outside to make Mom believe he's doing something.

4:00 Sits back down and studies the pictures of the kids again.

4:30 Mom leaves to work at says, "Can you accomplish something today? Dad ignores her.

5:00-8:00 Watches football, gives Jeff money to go get Big Juds and then watches ESPN or other sports station Jeff chooses.

8:30-10:00 Another bath, with hot water left trickling.

10:00-11:30 While Jeff is playing poker online, Dad secretly turns to the "Girls next door" marathon on E.

11:30 Dad, worn out, retires to bed

Pubic Sc-hair

As others have drawn attention to personal flaws (Blake's obvious weight, Jeff's botched 4-wheeling adventure etc.) I thought I would join the ring of personal humiliation. Pictured to the right are my friends at our first "Ugly Sweater Christmas" party. Note the crotches: what's up with Brandon's? Whatever it is I didn't do it on purpose.

Subliminal

Despite our many efforts to keep Grant away from the numbing influence of sports: dinosaur crib bumper, pictures of Prague on his bedroom walls, blocking out the ESPN channels on the TV, and putting him to sleep with NPR podcasts, he has finally been corrupted by Uncle Jeff.

Once we put on the jersey he was crawling all over the living room. It seemed make him surprisingly more athletic.

As you can see from the photo, Grant is doing his Grandpa Shirley sports watching impression: he drops what he's doing, says, "go! go! go! . . . go!" and then claps his hands together in enjoyment or disappointment. The way the Jazz play, it's likely to lead to disappointment.

We'll let him have his fun and continue being a Jazz fan. Kids usually learn best when you let them fall once in a while.

The jersey looks great Jeff, Grant sends his thanks.

D'OH

What a $&*%$#$ Christmas

Here's pictures of my accident last weekend that throughly destroyed what little Christmas cheer I had. Enjoy.

American Idol 2007 Auditions: SLC, UT